On our conversion
I used to believe conversion was a moment in time. I used to see conversion as an event that happened when we prayed a prayer or made a decision - and from that point on, we were choosing to trust God with our lives.
As much as I treasure the moments of profound surrender that have happened along my life’s journey, I no longer think of conversion that way. I see it instead as a process.
I am constantly being converted into God’s ridiculous way of love.
We’ve spent the last two Sundays exploring Jonah. One of the interesting words in our second reading (Jonah 3:1-10) came from the announcement this reluctant prophet made when he finally entered the God-forsaken city of Nineveh: “Forty more days and Nineveh will be overthrown,” he told the city’s inhabitants.
What’s interesting is that the Hebrew word interpreted “overthrown” can have multiple meanings. It can mean overthrow in that everything & everyone would be destroyed, or it could mean everything would be turned over or it could mean all would be changed. This was the brief message Jonah was given to preach, but it’s ambiguous. It could mean “40 more days and Nineveh will be destroyed” or “40 more days and Nineveh will change”.
And Nineveh immediately repents. They immediately opt for change over destruction. Yet, it becomes clear from Jonah’s response to Nineveh being spared that he was really rooting for their destruction. They had done horrible things after all - horrible, horrible things - no doubt he wanted them to pay. His idea of justice was that evil-doers eventually get what’s coming to them. Fair enough.
But that isn’t what happens. Nineveh is spared. And Jonah is furious.
When it comes to evil-doers in the world - those who perpetuate violence & oppression - what are we hoping for? When it comes to our enemies - those who oppose what we believe it good & true & right - what are we hoping will happen to them? Do we want them to be destroyed or to be changed?
Because I think our honest response gets to the heart of things or maybe better, the soul of things. There is a lot of talk about recovering the soul of our nation, and looking into our own souls seems like a good place to start.
Because while we know we can’t actually change anyone, there is something significant about us becoming able to root for change and not for destruction.
Do you know what I mean?
It has to do with our inner life. It’s a posture we learn and a way of being in the world we nurture. Real growth, real transformation & true conversion happen as we enter a new way of BEING in the world - the Jesus way of being - and it takes practice. LOTS of practice. And while we may never arrive, we do become more liberated, more loving, and more able to join God in the renewal of everything.
As we enter this new week, let’s practice paying attention. In the moments when we feel ourselves being pulled into our love of hatred -into hating so much that we hope for the destruction of human life - might we dare to pause and to nurture hope instead - a stubborn hope that all will be well, that all will know Love, that all will be free to live into the Goodness, the Beauty and the Love of God.
Let that be the place from which we live and work and advocate and seek justice in the world.
Peace + love,
Susan